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Cancer Survivor’s Testimonial – Ashleigh: My Dreams Were Put on Hold

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20 year old Ashleigh is in her second year of development studies at Mulungushi University in Kabwe. She developed head and neck cancer and was treated at Lusaka’s Cancer Diseases Hospital’s paediatric ward. In 2016, over a hundred children received cancer treatment free of charge, enabling more of Zambia’s children to get well and to get back to normal.

I was 15 when doctors told me the swelling in my neck was cancer. I thought it was mumps so I didn’t think it was anything serious.

This was in 2012. We were on holiday in Choma, Southern province when my aunt’s friend was concerned about the lump and told my mother to have it checked. She said it’s the smallest things that turn out to be very serious.

We went to the General Hospital in Livingstone near where we lived and they put me on antibiotics. But it didn’t help.

The doctor told me I should go to the University Training Hospital (UTH) in Lusaka to work out what it was. Leaving my friends and family behind was hard for me, and this happened during term time so I had to juggle this with my school work. At least I was able to stay with my mother’s friend in Lusaka who I knew, but it wasn’t home.

The pain of being told I had cancer

At UTH, they tested me for everything, even HIV and TB. Other than this lump on the right side of my neck I was healthy. After 2 biopsies, I was referred to the Cancer Diseases Hospital at UTH.

This is when they told me I had cancer. I was so sad. I cried a lot. I loved my hair and did not want to lose it. It was very hard to cope with. I told a couple of my closest friends who I trusted about my illness. I soon regretted this as they told everyone, and rumours started going round that I was going to die.

I had so many dreams and things I wanted to do in my life, I didn’t want this to be the end of it all. From that moment I chose not to ignore this illness and to fight against it.

I was relieved when my doctor told me that my cancer had been caught early and was treatable. But I was also worried as I had to stay in Lusaka for my treatment and I had got very behind at school. Getting my treatment started was taking some time. By this stage, I had been out for a whole term receiving treatment. I missed being at home with my friends a lot and I really missed going to school.

My life changed in many ways

My dad got me into a local Muslim school so I could keep up my studies. Being a Christian this was strange for me at first, but it was kind of OK because all the girls wore a veil on their heads, so no one knew I had no hair. This helped me feel normal. As a result I didn’t get called names and I wasn’t bullied. I felt free! Although, at lunchtimes when I was with the other girls, we could take our veils off. I had to make up some reason so they would not ask me any questions. I was so envious of their hair. My illness didn’t make me feel pretty at all. I actually put weight on, even though I was told people with cancer lose weight. It was strange. Even so, I was able to catch up with all my studies and finish school at the same time as my friends.

My cancer really affected my mum. She got terribly sick with worry. My aunt would also take care of her while I was having my treatment. I felt very guilty that I could not do more to help her and blamed myself that I was the cause of this.

I knew that everything in life happens for a reason so I had to be strong and put my health first.

I didn’t want cancer to get me down. I drew strength and inspiration from many other brave cancer patients I met. It was amazing how positive and strong they could be.

It is still a challenge each time I have to go back to hospital for my checks. But things are going OK and I am very happy. I never imagined that I would be here now, loving life and going to university.

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